There was bound to be a heavy post at some point so here it is – the painful rejection of indifference. I was listening to The Lumineers the other day when a song I hadn’t heard in a while came on. Thanks shuffle! It was “Stubborn Love” and it wasn’t long before I remembered why I fell in love with this band for the first time.
“It’s better to feel pain, than nothing at all. The opposite of love’s indifference.”
It got me thinking about times of hardship and how the most painful response that you can get from someone is none at all.
Think about it, when someone ignores you, you get irritated. Now think about being in need. Genuinely requiring the assistance of a loved one and in response you receive stone-faced neutrality. There is no greater disappointment. There is no greater loneliness.
Although some of us won’t ever admit it, at some point in our lives we need support. Some of us more frequently than others but when you do, you do. I will admit it. I will admit it every day. I suffer from chronic self doubt and sometimes the power of someone standing behind you being your biggest fan is paramount.
I find myself in a situation wherein I feel like I am drowning in a sea of indifference. When you are breaking down in the presence of another, willing them to acknowledge your pain and hoping you will be met with support but the response is nothing – what do you do? Just what do you do when you are the only one present and fighting for everything before you? I haven’t found an answer, except to keep on fighting.
This leads me to a quote from Dante Alighieri – not exactly renowned for his cheery positivity but there are some pretty stellar words to be found in his writings,
“The hottest places in hell are reserved for those who, in times of great moral crisis, maintain their neutrality”
Indifference between two is not neutrality. Neutrality is defined as supporting neither side during conflict. Conflict between two, by very definition, cannot have neutrality it is the battle between caring and not.
Indifference is blatant disregard. It is callous and careless, disinterest. It is aloof and negative and it is the opposite of love.
And in the battle between love and nothing at all – why would any of us choose the latter?
Furthermore, I find myself wondering, what happens to a person somewhere in their life to harden to such a degree, to brush aside those closest to them, to reject love and choose pride, ego and solitude?
Answers, I fear I will never find…
(F.Y.I if you want to learn more of Dante Alighieri’s writing, particularly ‘The Divine Comedy’ then I suggest reading Dan Browne’s ‘Inferno’ to lessen the load!)